17th November 2009

Has Passed Like The Other 17 Years. Or Not, Because At Least There Was Still A Celebration, Albeit A Tiny One. Thanks Y'all From Fan's Tutorial Group Who Where Here To Celebrate For Me, Eventhough We Barely Knew Each Other For 5 Months. And Thanks For The Nike Bag, People Of No.53 And Maybe Even Some Of Those From Fan's Gang. That's My 1st Ever Nike Product In My Life LOLZXD

The Line Here Has Been As Horrible As Ever. Online Gaming Was Possible As The Sun Freezing As Soon As I Snap My Fingers. TM Says 1Gbps Line In 4 Hot Spots By The End Of 2010, So When The FUCK Will It Reach Kampar!? And By 2012, Will The Entire KL/Selangor Be Covered!? Hell, TM Is Planning On Something That Should've Been Done Ages Ago. They're So Reliable When It Comes To Doing A Poor Job, And Yet They Have The Guts To Directly Mock P1 WiMax With Their "Why Trust Beginners?" Advertisement In The Papers. Indeed, Big Mouth, No Brains; Not Walking The Talk.

So Yeah, Exams Real Soon, Assignments Handed In, Waiting To Be Presented. This Is Gonna Be One Hell Of A Semester.

Adieu To Y'all. Until TM Walks The Talk, Or Until I Get Impatient And Meet Y'all In Person, Whichever First.

Perfectly Flawed

That's Me People. I Just Realized How Flawed I Actually Am In The Field Where I Thought I Was Perfect In. Not Only Did I Lose The Sponsorships, I Lost By A Very Very Great Margin.

Confidence Came Crumbling Down Much Like The USA World Trade Center Twin Towers. But Then At Least There's Something To Work On; In This Field That Very Much Meant One Of The Few Things That Is Worth Being Proud Of. No Point Staying Stuck Without Having Chances Of Improvement, Right?

I Lost Count Of Which Week This Is, Though I Vaguely Remember It Being The 5th. Means Finals In 3 Weeks From Today. Or 4? Whatever It Is, It Also Means That Home Is That Much Closer.

So Yeah, Adieu To Y'all.

Ethereal Tear

Though I'd Be Tossed Like Garbage, It Would Seem That The One That Departs Willingly Will Be Treated Like Treasure Until Then.

I Understand Not Anymore What Goes On Around Me. These 2 Or 3 Uneventful Months Have Turned Me Into An Idiot. The Surrounding Dullness Has, In Turn, Dulled My Senses With It. Every Word And Action Has Deeper Ulterior Motives And Meanings Behind Them That I Can't Seem To Comprehend Anymore. My Intelligence Waning, My Strength Sapped, My Agility Crippled. A Living Hell, A Nightmare Of Reality.

Perhaps I Should Just Drink Myself To Stupor Like What Every Other Fool Does; I Don't Seem To Be Any Different, Let Alone Superior, To Them Anymore, So Any Harm In Stooping As Low As The Bunch That I've Become So Similar To? I'll Just Let Whatever Remains Of My Conscience Decide On That, While I Let Fate And Destiny Decide My Course In Life Like Leaves In The Wind.

And The Law Of Attraction Is A Fraud. I Just Remembered This Illusion That I've Lived All My Life Since I Was 11 Years Old; Felt Its Warmth, Enjoyed Its Embrace, Lived As If It Were Real, But Will It Ever BE Real? That's The Question That The Law Fails And Will Never Succeed In Answering. But I Shall Continue To Live In This Illusion, And To Keep Transcending This Greater Illusion That Mere Mortals Call Reality, For Only That Is Keeping The Inner Demon From Unleashing True Armageddon.

And With That, Adieu To Y'all. You'll Know When This Soiled Treasure Is Discarded.

Nether Vengeance

Today Was, In Short, A Calamity. What Started As A Rather Cheerful One Ended In Heat, Close to A Family Feud. And Initially I Was Supposed to Be The Star Of Sorrow For This Post. Initially. And I'd Say That It Is Not Fortunate That It Turned To Be The Other Way Around.

At First, I Felt Betrayed. My Place Was Taken By Another. What Was Rightfully Mine Is Now The Privilege Of An Outsider. Benefits That Were Exclusively Mine Were Robbed By Another. Though I Was Far From Speechless, I Still Have It In My Mind That Voicing Them Out Would Lead To Further Misunderstanding, And With That Another Heartbreak Was Kept, Or Rather, Remained, Silent.

Although Predicted, I Never Expected It To Have Come So Soon... But Perhaps If I Have Truly Forseen This Event Then I Should Have Braced Myself For It, Regardless of How Soon It Came. Indeed, I Felt Like A Soiled Cloth Tossed Away, Replaced By A New One.

But All That Changed. And What Would've I Told Another I Realized I Should've Told Myself Too:

Minna mo Shounen da.
Ore wa Wakaru, Kimi no Kimochi, Demo Genjitsu wa Kore:
Riyuu wa So Kantan ja Nai yo。

One Of The Many Fears Of Counselors Not Written In Text Books, Or That I Missed: Saying The Worng Things At The Wrong Time. And That, I'm Given First Hand Experience...

And Sorry Guys. I Lied About 2012 Being Merely So-So. But You Should Just Watch It For Yourselves To Know How It Actually Was, For I Fear Our Perceptions Differ Again.

And I Have 5 Hours to Sleep Before I Go For A Battle For Sponsorships, And I Intend To Give My All, Deprived Of Sleep Or Otherwise.

Adieu To Y'all. And Infinite Apologies.

Weak Week

This Week Was, In Short, NOT COOL.

Wednesday Was A Real Killer. Midterm And Right After That We Had To Meet For A Whole Day To Finish Up An Assignment That's Due The Next Day. Lost Loads Of Sleep There. And Today Something Unpleasant Was Abruptly Announced That Has Left Most of Us On The Edge. Won't Wanna Elaborate Yet, Because People Should Not Worry About This Yet, And When They Should, The Problem Would've Been Resolved, Peacefully Or Otherwise, Which Ends Their Reason To Worry. I Can't Say I'm Not Negatively Affected As Well, But Guess I'd Look At The Brighter Side Of Things: One Less Liability To Look After.

All I Can Say Is: See The World For What It Is, Feel The Pain Of Reality For Yourself, And Be Grateful For For The Providence That You Chose To Discard, For You Won't Find Another As Good, And For Your Sake I Hope That What You Have Abandoned Is Not Lost To You Should You Realize You Need It Again.

Net Life Has Definitely Taken Its Toll On People, And I'm Feeling Kinda Down That I'm Glad I'm Not Alone. Oh Well, Hope Things Change Soon.

Adieu To Y'all While I Continue Hogging Fan's PC -.-'

Law Of Attraction?

A Very Far-Fetched Theory (I Still Cannot Accept It As A Law, As It Is Defiable) In The Book/DVD 'The Secret'. For Those Who Haven't Already Know What's This About, It Basically Means That Just By Thinking And Feeling Continuously What You Want Without It Being A Chore And It'll Come True Some Time Sooner Or Later. Debatable IMO, But I'd Say This Topic Is Abstract As The Supernatural, So It's Wiser Not To Bother.

Why The Heck Am I Talking About This Of All Things? Since Today Is A Day Before The Midterms Mr Yusoff, Our Psychotherapy Lecturer, Decided That We Should Watch This Instead Of Letting Students Pester Him With Tip-Begging.

And I Found Myself Playing 'Borderlands' Again. Pitiful Me.

Thanks To Assignments And Midterms, Nothing Really Gets The Chance To Happen. It's The Same Rote Routine Of Doing Stuff For Those Assignments And Presentations And Studying For Midterms And Exams. And All That Cramped Into 7 Weeks For The Short Semester. And Is It Just Me Or Does Bachelors Degree Life Take The Essence Of Life Away? And I Mean It Literally, Because The More I Progress With This 3 Year Course The More I Feel That It's Getting More And More Repetitive. And Interesting Stuff That Should Happen In Between Are Getting Less And Less. Yeah, Yeah, People Are Gonna Start Throwing At Me The "It's Just 2 Semesters, Who Are You To Judge" Shit But That's How It Feels Like, 2 Sems Or Otherwise.

And I Continue To Have My Mind Occupied With Gundams. And As I Do So, So Do More Braincells Fly Away Just As Money Would If I Materialize What I Visualize.

With That, Adieu To Y'all As We All Continue Listening To The 3 Hearts. XD

P.S.: Thanks To Revision, I Think I May Have A Form Of Superiority Complex...

Darkness Also Illimunates

A Cool Phrase Taken From Saw The Game. Though The Game Itself Would Be Hard To Understand Without Watching At Least The First 3 Movies, PLaying The Game Itself Is Like Watching Another Movie Of The Series; Gory Enough To Make You Sick.

Went To Ipoh To Watch 'Ninja' Last Saturday. Though The Title Was One That Really Got Me Into It And All The Cool Fighting Action, The Story Just Simply Sucked. Sorry Guys For Dragging Y'all Along With Me For That Crappy Movie. Hope 2012 Would Be Better, Which Comes This Thursday.

Got Hooked On To A Game Called 'Borderlands', An FPS RPG With A Level System, Recently, And Now I Find It Real Hard To Resist The Temptation Of Playing It.

There Were Loads Of Other Things I Wanted To Say, But My Mind Is Copletely Dominated By Gundam Kits Now, So I'll Just Leave It Here.

Adieu To Y'all.