The end of immortality

Fading is my confidence,
Lost is my coherence,
Is this a sign of my mortality,
Or am I losing my sanity?

Will I share the fate of the lotus eater,
Or will my suffering be much greater?

Perhaps in the end it matters not,
For even losing battles must be fought,
Knowing I've strived for the best that could be,
Empowered the few who matter to me,
That, is my unofficial victory.