Fallout Fallacy

Been Not As Long A Time As I Hoped, But I Guess The Urgency Precedes My Own Selfish Wishes.

They Say That Every Man Worth A Damn Is A Hypocrite. I Would've Begged To Differ, But Unfortunately For Me, I Now See Evidence Of The Truth Behind The Sentence.

Either That, Or I Would Doom Myself To Never Be A Someone For The Sake Of Not Being A Hypocrite. But Perhaps The Former Is Worse, And I'd Rather Be A Nobody Than A Hypocrite.

Why This Same Old Crap On Honesty And Hypocrisy Again? Well, People Do Many Things That They Don't Mean. And It Hurts Me, If Anyone, To See People Showing Me A Sweet Smile On Their Faces When I Know They Don't Mean It. Damn, I'd Rather You Keep Your Distance Like How You Usually Do And Be Yourself Instead Of Putting Up This Act Of Kindness Just Because Everyone Else Is Doing It. Hell, By All Means, Smite Me Openly, Publicly Even. Just Don't Put Up That Show. It Painful For Me To Watch Even If It's Not Tiring For You To Put Up The Shit. And I'm Sure I'm Not Being An Exotic Weirdo For Thinking So, And Thus I'm Like Making A Public Service Announcement With This.

Well, Main Point Being, And Damn I Love This Quote:

"It Is Better To Be Hated For What You Are, Than To Be Loved For What You Are Not." Gide (1869-1951 French)

Unless You Actually Enjoy It, Then Please Go Find Someone Else To Do It To. But Then Again, Probably I Have You To Thank, Because I've Been Dying To Share This; Quoted From A Namesake Of Mine:

I still can't forget you. I love how the memory of you makes everything else in the world look wonderful...

...by comparison.

Though All The Ugliness Of This Cold War Could Be Avoided, I Guess It Could Only Be Avoided If Different People Were In The Shoes Of All The Involved.

All The Ugliness Aside, Thanks Everyone. For Spicing Up This Otherwise Boring Life With All The Good, Bad And Ugly That Makes This Life Uniquel Mine.

Adieu To Y'all. And This Marks The Beginning Of The 3rd Decade Of My Life.

P.S.: War Does Not Determine Who Is Right, Only Who Is Left.

Once Upon A Time, Yet In The Distant Future.

This Post Should've Been Up Last Week, But Due To Stuff That No One Needs To Care About, It's Up Now.

I'm Starting To Like My Lecturer, Mr Tan Kok Wei. Though He's Extremely Sarcastic During Lectures (Sarcasm Is Somewhere On The Top In The List Of Things I Hate), But His Tutorial Classes Are Really The Thing That Universities Lack, And Must Have; Open Discussion Sessions Where People Actually Get To Voice Out Their Views On How They Apply The Stuff That They Shove Up Their Heads In The Real World. Sadly However, Through Voicing Out My Ideas And His Criticism, We Have Indirectly Formed An Equation:

University = Study, Memorize, Ideals
Practicality = College, Vocational School
Thus University =/= Practical

Because People Come To University To Memorize Information, Not Apply Them In Life. Even The Highest Level Of Education That Can Be Obtained From Universities Is The PhD, Or Doctor Of Philosophy. Thus All We Learn Are Pointless Information In Our Undergrad, Finally Some Practicality Depending On The Choice Of Our Specialization For Masters And All Impractical Ideals And Philosophies For PhD. Also Meaning That People Pay More For People Who Can Come Up With Grand Ideas But Cannot Make Use Of / Apply Basic And Useful Information Instead Of People Who Get The Job Done But Lacking In Creativity. Which Leads To Another Equation:

Dream = Higher Pay
Work = Lower Pay

Though Excuse My Choice Of Words. I'm Trying To Keep The Equations As Short As Possible. Although Exaggerated, The Basic Idea Remains. People Who Are Able To Make Use Of What They Learn Are Being Rewarded Less Than People Who Come Up With Ideas And Make Others Learn.

I Kept Thinking To Myself: If This Is How The System Works, Then What Is The World Coming To? Now That My Refusal To Accept The Way Reality Is Was Countered And Criticized, It Only Confirms To Me That Reality Rules. Ideals Are Destined To Fail Epicly. In Other Words, World Peace = Epic Fail. Immorality Suddenly Became The Most Moral Thing. Because To Survive One Cannot Afford To Be Selfless, Thus Selfishness Is The Way To Go Because It Is Immoral To Not Want To Survive Because Not Wanting To Live Equals Suicide. And Every Other Thing Along Those Lines.

These May Make No Sense To Most Of You, But It All Relates. Me Putting Them In This Short Equation Just Brings The Starting And Finishing Point Closer.

But At The Same Time I'm Reminded That Nothing Is True, Everything Is Permitted. So People Are Allowed To Do Stuff That Don't Make Sense In The Name Of Making Sense. Much Like Killing In The Name Of Peace. Or Dividing People In The Name Of Unity. Or Manipulating People In The Name Of Helping Them. Since These Are What War, Religion And Politics, Respectively, Do To People Anyway. Then Again, All Of Them Can Actually Be Used Interchangably Instead Of Each Description Matching Only One Word. And Since Nothing Is True And Everything Is Permitted, Let Me Also Share This With You Before Anyone Starts Flaming Themselves:

Know this before you argue,
There is no truth in this world, only points of view,
From a different angle, something else is true,
From where we stand, the sky may be an azure blue,
But from somewhere else, it is of another hue.

Adieu To Y'all. Food For Thought, People.

Miraculous Comeback, Not.

Much Has Happened Since The Last Post. Infinitely Much. Too Much To Explain Them All, Too Much To Bear Alone, Even. But What's Worse, When I've Decided To Take Them All On, Someone Dear Succumbed To Pressure.

So I Very Much Dedicate This Post To My Bro, Not In Blood, But In Bond. And Of Course Rant Some Shit Of My Own.

And Yes, I've Not Forgotten My Vow To Not 'Fish For Sympathy', Consciously Nor Otherwise, But Rather, This Rant Of Mine Will Also Hopefully Be Not Just A Personal Rant, But Also Be Some Form Of Support, Or In Less Ideal Words, Consolation, For Whoever It May Apply To.

Well First Of All, My Sincerest Apologies To My Bro, Yat. Infinite Apologies For Forcing My Passion Onto You, That Has Put You Through Hell; Making You Experience An Avoidable Burden. I Guess The Gift Of Poetry Really Isn't For Everyone.

Honestly, I Truly Feared That This Day Would Come. And By The Worst Of Luck, It Did. I Always Knew That What Works For Me Would Never Work For Others, But It Just Felt So Good To Have This Gift That I Felt That It Must Be Shared. But Then Again, How Many Would See Darkness As A Gift The Way I Do? How Many See The Blinding Light As Corruption The Way I Do?

The Very Eerie Darkness That Scares The Crap Out Of People Is The Serene Darkness That Calms My Senses. The Very Light That Enlightens People Blinds Me. I Guess I Am Truly The Only Devil Among Men. Perhaps This Sets Me Apart From All Others; People Hold On To Hope While I Accept Despair With Open Arms.

But Perhaps In This Guilt Of Mine I Have Guided You To Find Your True Self. It Is As You Quoted, "There Is No Need To Pretend,Simply Do What You Can," And Similarly, "It Is Better To Be Hated For What You Are, Than To Be Loved For What You Are Not." Gide (1869-1951 French)

Thus I Have Chosen The Path Never Before Traversed. I Have Chosen To Outcast Myself And Be Who I Am: A Person Beyond Mortal Comprehension, Beyond Mortal Compassion. I Chose To Be Antisocial, To Be Like The Cantonese Saying 'If You Can Say It, Then You Must Be Able To Do It'. With That I Free Myself From Hypocrisy That So Many Mere Mortals Condemn Themselves Into With Words Like "Life is not just about myself, but also about my family, and also friends around me," Meaningless Words That They Can Merely Utter, But Never Hold On To.

Thus I Shall Be Hated For What I Am, An Antisocial Who Couldn't Care Less About A Self-Destroying World Than Be Loved For What I Am Not, A Person Who Pretends To Care But Deep Down Inside, Makes Use Of Others Like Tools Without A Care For Their Feelings. I Shall Be Hated For Embracing The Darkness That Enlightens Me, Than Be Loved For Pretending To Revel In The Corrupting Light.

Though It Breaks My Heart To See You Stop Poetry, I Guess It Shatters It To See It Doing Such Harm To You. And Though Most Of My Original Works Are Lost To A World Of Petty Thieves, Here I Am Again To Give You My First Work Ever Since That Tragic Incident.

The Devil watches another fall,
Deviating from his unnatural call,
He knows that he shall not squall,
For it is fate that alone, he stands tall.

Leaving footsteps that none can follow,
Unfathomed depths among the shallow,
He flies alone like a lone sparrow,
Leaving this world, one so hollow.

The Devil was glad, though, for one thing,
A cohort has found a brand new spring,
A true path in which he remains king,
Without His aid, no more under His wing.

He realized His own true power,
A massive unfathomable tower,
As He marched on alone,
In the peace of his companion,
For His sins He has done atone.

Since You Have Found Your True Path, All That Is Left That I Can Do Is To Wish You A Safe Journey Ahead. Though For One Thing, Perhaps Deep Down Inside, I'm Glad That You're At The Very Least, More Normal That I Can Ever Be.

Adieu To Y'all. Now We Shall Carry On Our Separate Ways.