Taking out the trash and sorting stuff out.

The time has finally come when, even if I did not want to, I have to move on. Not saying that I don’t, though I must admit, I was unable to at some point. And for that I must apologize to a friend which I may soon forget for doubting the truth in her words.

Which reminds me of another friend I once had. I’m not sure if the person is even alive at this moment, but I remember him saying something along the lines of “the term ’friends forever’ is one of the greatest lies one can tell.” And he’s right, mainly because it will be one of the most repeated and overused ones despite not being heavy on its own. Of course there are exceptions, where one is so close with another that their bond becomes that of family instead of mere friends, though that is a privilege I grant to no one until the day before my death. Sorry if anyone’s feelings got hurt, but there are few things I despise more than sounding sure about something and then being proven wrong while I’m still alive. Then again, if you know me well enough to deserve such recognition, you would also understand this fact and thus not be hurt in the first place.

Like I was saying, the current phase in my life is coming to an end. This means that most of the people in it are likely to be forgotten, some more completely than others; some as if they never existed. Some you wish never actually did but you end up remembering them only because you cannot afford to allow what they did to you happen again, while some others you remember them so well because of something pleasant they done to/for you that you wish they’d constantly remind you of it, just not with the words ‘did you remember the time when…’. And I am glad that the end has come, because this phase sucked real bad.

Nowadays I rarely have enough time on my hands that I actually have any time used for overthinking things; most of my free time I now spend fantasizing about me being the main character of some epic ultimate illusion. Or Final Fantasy, if you will. The times I actually spend on thinking these days, however, have proved to be more fruitful than before. I’ve recently come to realize most of the big stuff in life are the ones that hurt me while it is the little things in life that makes, and keeps, me happy, like when a stranger says “thank you” for a deed you’re not even intentionally doing. This has then led me to realize that I was more juvenile than I’d like to think.

I also realize that I’m not as hurt as I thought I would/should be when I found out that I’m now a complete stranger to the person that I talked with the most (if not the only one) outside campus hours and regarding non-academic stuff during my foundation year. Sucks to have the fact that you’re getting old smack you in the face like that. 

And so, with that, young brother, seek not happiness; let it (or her, for that matter) seek you instead, for happiness is like a butterfly: actively seek it out and it flies away, but stay still where you are and it might just rest on your hand. Take pleasure in the small things in life, and make sure you don’t have even a single fuck to give to those who seek your ruin, people and situations alike.

And with that, adieu to y’all.